By Patrick Brandmeyer
Photo Credit Brian Kelley

The show started with a ten-bell salute for Muhammad Ali.

Brandon Aarons vs. “Infamous” Tyler Copeland for the MMWA Jr. Heavyweight Title:

These guys have been around the horn a few times and had a good solid opener; Aarons won with the close-range superkick in 9:47. Copeland complained that he wasn’t adequately prepared since the match was the opener(suuuuure) and wanted a rematch, even offering to put his hair on the line. Copeland doesn’t have a whole lot to sacrifice in that regard, but Aarons accepted the challenge and the match was set for July 9th. If that stipulation went both ways, the female fans would have heart attacks over the prospect of Aarons’ luxurious locks being in jeopardy…in all heterosexuality, the man has a tremendous head of hair.

Tag Team Champion Brandon Espinosa vs. “The Millenial” Danny Adams for the Missouri Wrestling Revival Missouri Title: This was the first appearance of the MWR MO belt at South Broadway. Espy & Ace Hawkins’ Tag Title feud with The Family (Prince Moses & Damion Cortess) seems to be on the back burner as Moses is out of action with an injury. Espy referenced the fact that he and Adams both train with Michael Elgin, so he has a bit more respect for Adams than for a lot of the guys in the locker room.

They had a really good matchup that got a lot of time; Adams is progressing nicely and has been getting his name on people’s radars in recent months. The cross-armbreaker is a tough hold to transition into professional wrestling as people are expected to fight through the pain of submission holds…however, this particular maneuver can legitimately break an arm if fully applied for enough time.

In that regard, a wrestler/fighter is likely to surrender quickly rather than risk a major injury. (I say this as someone who is not well-versed in the mixed martial arts world, so bear with my relative ignorance.) Espinosa won with the aforementioned hold in 16:19(!), but not without a strong effort on Adams’ part…they shook hands afterwards, though Espy was still a bit dismissive of his opponent’s efforts.

Damion Cortess vs. Barackus: The big man turned on The Family in May to cost Moses & Cortess the Tag Titles to Espinosa & Ace Hawkins.

This one didn’t even get started as the combatants brawled at ringside until Hawkins blindsided Cortess, leading to a two-on-one attack. With Moses on the disabled list, it seemed like no one was available to help Cortess…but he got assistance from a surprise source in the form of J-Mal Swagg. Commissioner Jim Harris ordered an impromptu tag match as a result…playa.

J-Mal Swagg & Damion Cortess vs. Tag Team Champion “The” Ace Hawkins & Barackus: Swagg has his own fanbase at South Broadway, so this change of attitude seemed like a natural progression. he rulebreaking duo took a walk for the countout in 11:49; by that, I mean Barackus walked out with Hawkins slung over his shoulder. Heh.

Moondog Rover vs. “The Incredible” Matt Kenway (Look At Him): When I don’t make it to an MMWA event, I watch the archived webcast. The commentary is provided by The Dirty Heinous Show and “Dirty” is the main guy on the mic…his insistent reference to THE INCREDIBLE MATT KENWAY LOOK AT HIM created my above designation. (To be fair, being the only pale white guy in the building with cornrows probably prompted a few awkward glances at the May show.) At this show, the commentary was primarily provided by Evan Gelistico and Mike Outlaw, creating the unusual setup of a St. Louis Anarchy guy and a Dynamo Pro guy (respectively) calling an MMWA show. Moondog OVAH~! tends to be the fan favorite by default…whoever he’s facing rarely gets cheered against him, so opponents just have to go with that flow.

The Incredible Matt Kenway Look At Him tried to take out the leg, but Moondog simply overpowered him and won with a World’s Strongest Slam in 5:33. After the match, Gelistico left the webcast position and entered the ring with a chair…Rover turned his attention to Evan, setting up The Incredible Matt Kenway Look At Him to deliver a low blow from behind. Gelistico beat down Moondog with a chair until Big Hoffarth hit the ring to run him off; Evan and The Incredible Matt Kenway Look At Him left together.

“Da Bomb” Brian James vs. Big Jim Hoffarth for the T.V. Title: All things considered, Big Jim probably didn’t need to go back to the dressing room as he was in the next matchup; that left the door open for James to attack him from behind as he made his re-entrance. Jimmy D came out to ringside but didn’t actively get involved; his presence was probably a distraction to the challenger as they’ve had issues in recent months. James won with the sitout gourdbuster (not an easy task given Hoffarth’s size) in 6:56; Jimmy D made fun of Hoffarth’s losing effort afterwards, but D had his own matters to attend to.

Shaft vs. “The Enforcer” Jimmy D, loser-wears-a-dress match: The stipulation said that the loser would be forced to wear a dress for all of his subsequent wrestling appearances in the MMWA. Shaft has been a consistent presence at local wrestling shows but hasn’t competed regularly in several years. Jim Hoffarth took a seat at ringside, looking for some payback for Jimmy D’s earlier actions.

Jimmy D appeared to be the more ring-ready of the two, but Hoffarth’s distraction allowed Shaft to get the rollup pin in 7:14. Unfortunately Jim Harris didn’t have a full-fledged dress for D to wear, instead opting for a black skirt that didn’t look all that notable against D’s dark-colored attire. Harris promised that D would have a brighter-colored ensemble when he faces Hoffarth in July.

“Night Train/Great One/Gorgeous” Gary Jackson vs. “2.0” Da’Marius Jones(w/ B.T.) vs. A.J. Williams: B.T. is the former Jackson Whitechapel/Clownman Jacko and he brought a stop sign to the ring. Since this match format is no-DQ anyway, B.T. blatantly whacked Jackson with the sign in the early going, prompting a fight at ringside between the champion and Jones’ security man. Since Jones and Williams are tag team partners, the main question was whether a split would occur over who would get the title-winning victory. We got an answer, but probably not the one we wanted…Williams locked Jackson in a Sharpshooter while Jones hooked a Crippler Crossface at the same time. Jackson tapped out in a surprisingly short 6:40…but who was the champion?

MMWA went through a similar situation last year when then-champion Williams fought Jones to a double-fall draw, leading to a title vacancy…and we got the same result here as Harris declared the title to be held up. The championship would be decided in July in a four-corner match involving Jackson, Williams, Jones, and another former champion: Kevin Lee Davidson.