Lumberjacks, a Cage and FirePup in Swansea
Posted by flairwhoooooo on November 15, 2016
By Patrick Brandmeyer
Our ring announcer was Drew Abbenhaus; your referees were Denny Thomas, Jay King, and Nick Ridenour.
A local young lady sang the National Anthem to start the show…nicely done. Promoter Herb Simmons acknowledged the many sponsors and supporters of SICW as well as the Swansea Fire Department prior to the show’s opening matchup.
Big Daddy’s main charge Vic The Bruiser has been gaining momentum, picking up a recent win over Sean Vincent and being scheduled to face Gary Jackson at the next East Carondelet show.
This was your standard-issue Moondog match, but Waco got the cheap rollup pin with a handful of denim in 6:57.
Larry Matysik paid a visit to say a few words to the fans in attendance. I shook his hand as he was leaving…unfortunately, I’ve only had a handful of opportunities to converse with Larry. If I’d remembered the raffle for a steak dinner with Larry and Herb, I would have brought more cash than I did…
Big Jim Hoffarth vs. “The Suplex Cyclone” Curt Gannon: Gannon recently made his St. Louis-area debut with a time-limit draw against Superstar Steve Fender in East Carondelet; this was my first time seeing him in person. He was able to execute a couple of very impressive suplexes on the 300-plus-pounder, living up to his nickname.
At one point Hoffarth accidentally threw Gannon over the top rope and the referee didn’t call for a disqualification…whoops. At any rate, Hoffarth rallied but missed a big splash off the second rope…Gannon took advantage with a hold called the Arachnid Clutch(a trapped-arm headscissors on the mat).
Not sure if it was a tapout or unconscious “submission”, but that was the ballgame in 7:02…slight upset there.
Flaming Freddie Fury vs. Purple Passion: THE REMATCH TO END ALL REMATCHES~! Fury and Passion entered together, but Herb told them that they were facing each other.
They did do more actual wrestling this time around, as opposed to going full comedy as they did in their previous bout.
“Dead Sexy” Daniel Gunner vs. “The” Ace Hawkins: Hawkins was particularly insistent about the ring announcement, especially the pronunciation of his nickname(“THEE”).
Gunner had a size and power advantage(as one heckling fan noted to Ace: “Why are you so tiny?”), but Ace used his speed and agility to gain an advantage. Gunner had a strong effort, but Ace rolled up him with feet on the ropes for the cheap win in 9:30.
“Your Canadian Hero” Sean Vincent vs. “Unstable” Dave Vaughn: These two have feuded for the past several months; Vaughn has been intent on turning Vincent into a “villain” again. The match was pretty good despite a few sloppy spots; Vincent just barely got Vaughn up and over for a backdrop in the early minutes of the match.
These two have worked together enough times that they’re familiar with each other(SCOUTING~!); Vincent picked up the victory after a Death Valley Driver in 11:01.
“Ironman” Ken Kasa vs. “Volatile” Curtis Wylde(w/ Wyldefyre), Lumberjack Match: The Swansea firefighters were the lumberjacks and made their entrance to “Proud To Be An American”. It took some time for them to get their cue…I had to make the wisecrack that, per Ben Simon, they were waiting for the beat to drop.
Wylde tried to walk away from the match, only to be blocked by the mascot Firepup and carried back to the ring by the firefighters. In terms of working for its intended purpose, I would consider this the best match of the night; Wyldefyre got another “Shiny Pants Has No Butt” chant, if I remember correctly.
Wyldefyre tried to interfere and a firefighter carried her away from ringside on his shoulders…hey, we just saw a fireman’s carry by an actual fireman! *ducks thrown objects* Firepup blinded Wylde with a fire extinguisher and Kasa capitalized with the John Wu Dropkick to win in 10:37…nicely done.
Classic Champion Ron Powers & “Night Train/Gorgeous/Great One” Gary Jackson vs. Attila Khan & Brandon Espinosa(w/ Travis Cook), best-of-three-falls cage match: This was a brawl from start to finish; Khan was left bloody, as has become tradition.
The match seemed rushed from my perspective, but the fans liked it and that’s what counted. Khan pinned Jackson after hitting him in the throat with his fork in 3:24. Jackson gave him a taste of his own medicine with a throat shot with the fork, pinning Khan to even the score in 5:10(total).
(Everyone’s favorite domestic terrorist Travis had the chutzpah to complain about Jackson’s use of the foreign object.) Espy scaled the cage to deliver a cross-bodyblock onto Powers & Jackson. (The cage wasn’t particularly tall compared to those in bigger promotions, but it was still a cool visual.) Travis threw a chair into the cage and decked the official on the arena floor, leading to Espinosa using it to clean house; however, he couldn’t score the deciding fall on either opponent. Khan picked up Jackson for a bodyslam, but fell over Powers in a schoolboy trip and Powers dropped an elbow on Khan for the final fall in 8:30(total); all right then. Powers defends against Espinosa at the East Carondelet show on the 19th…that should be a very interesting bout.
(EDIT 11/13: The TV show reminded me of more details from the bout; Travis actually entered the cage after striking referee Jay King in an attempt to interfere, then tried to get Espy out of the cage for the win only to find out that escaping the cage wasn’t an official way to win…heh.)